Being too accommodating in a relationship definition of e dating
You cannot begin to assume that you know what they are experiencing or feeling or thinking.
So being truthful is about your experience and feelings and thoughts.
I usually get caught up in my own stuff and react and stress and fight.
But once the dust has settled, I ask myself, does it really matter?
that "yuck wtf I'm confused and I want xyz, do i need to curb myself and be less needy to get her to make me happy" -- lol, that's her making you happy, and you're trying to get her to make it better.
Tell them they're pretty, and that you're curious to get to know them (maybe throw in a cute question! Most people don't go all in within the first week.
Next year will it be as important to me as it is today?
When I am old one day, would I really remember this particular disagreement? If only I could hear between the words, listen carefully to the tone of voice and read the other’s expression without projecting my own issues, fears and wants, I could possibly get hold of the fear driving their anger and be able to say something to them that will give them some peace and respite. At the end of the day, I think that there is only one question.
I don’t have the answer, but following Buddha’s advice, I would keep my mouth shut and not say a word and let the scenario play itself out.There were many times I felt badly hurt and neglected and ignored. The whole new age movement is all for cutting people who don’t add to your happiness or success. Many life coaches, positive thinking representatives and personal growth guru’s are quite clear about how negative people drag you down. But yet there is that niggling at the back of my mind which has a problem with this approach. I believe that the people in my life are there for a reason.Perhaps to teach me something about myself or for me to teach them something about themselves.Any conflict consists of at least 2 parties after all. A few years back, I had a friendship which started to deteriorate and I really tried to accommodate her. I know enough about the psyche to know that to be truthful is very difficult, especially with yourself; unconscious complexes driving us to believe in a certain point of view often obscure any attempt at realising the “truth”.
But, It really isn’t that easy to turn the other cheek. But eventually it was so untenable that when I finally did end the relationship, my feelings were so hurt that it took me months to get over it. If it is truthful and helpful, wait for the right time. (being wise has been a lifelong goal for me :-))These wise words have a goal and that is to be truthful and helpful at all times towards others. And then there is the problem of reaching deep down inside and finding the root of your anger or dissatisfaction. I draw a line quickly and if you cross it, well that’s it for our relationship. As an adult, I have grown to believe that things are not random, that people are in my life for a reason.