Dating and me
He knew he was caught and I ended things that night! "I had a feeling he was on Tinder again (we had deleted our accounts in front of each other when we started dating exclusively) since he had been distant all week with me, so I created a fake account kind to see if he was on there.I matched with him within minutes but didn't send him a message.With practice, dating has gotten a lot easier for me.At the beginning of my dating experimentation, my bully convinced me that I was “less than” for feeling nervous and having social anxiety.I find that communicating virtually lacks vulnerability and leaves a lot of room for interpretation, and what I think is happening and what is actually happening end up being two completely different things. When it’s a couple of days before the date, I feel quite optimistic, then when the actual day of the date hits, so does my social anxiety. The bully in my head puts pressure on me to act like the perfect human, carry on a flawless conversation, and act like I’m not extremely anxious.Thoughts of having to make eye contact with my date and being in a public place start to take over and fuel the bully as well.Now my approach to dating includes telling the other person when I am nervous because acting on the nerves decreases the negative thoughts I experience.When I choose to tell my date that I am nervous, it forms a connection of vulnerability between two people; then my date feels comfortable telling me that he’s nervous as well.
"I noticed my boyfriend was getting notifications from the OKCupid app, and the curiosity was driving me crazy.
When I begin “virtually speaking” with a prospective date, I find that the conversations can be extremely stressful for me.
I become consumed with what to say, how long to wait before replying, and trying to decipher what that other person “really” thinks about me.
Dating can be daunting in general, but if you struggle with social anxiety, it can seem impossible at times.
For me, one who struggles with social anxiety, dating can be a difficult process.
If you suffer from social anxiety, Anxiety Canada has a great section on social anxiety, including information on what social anxiety is, how to recognize social anxiety, and home management strategies that you can use to manage your social anxiety – https:// C, and is volunteering and working as a consultant for Anxiety Canada.