Dating in new online york


16-Oct-2020 03:06

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And so it was that, some four months into singledom, I gathered the courage to join Ok Cupid and head to a wine bar with Pete, a musician-turned-accountant whom I chose for his spectacularly anodyne profile. But I am nevertheless here to offer a defense of online dating, not necessarily as a tool for finding a partner — I have no idea if the internet will ever yield me true love — but rather as a world-enlarging enterprise, and a means of rebuilding one’s self in the wake of separation.

Now, over three years and seven dating apps later, I’ve gone out with 86 men and counting; I know because I keep a list that reads like free verse (“David the orphan … Yes, online dating can be deeply demoralizing, a parade of indignities that throws into relief not just our self-absorption and banality, but our nihilism too.

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When I was in my early 30s, my husband of four years, partner of nine, left abruptly in the middle of the night.

In the surreal weeks and months that followed, I grew increasingly apprehensive about the idea of online dating.

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I’ve met United Nations diplomats and my favorite movie star’s ex-husband.

If I stumble upon one more man who seeks a “partner in crime,” one more “sapiosexual” or “entrepreneur,” I fear I will stomp on my phone.



Those butterflies of excited joy as you open the latest message from your new match, your first glimpse as you turn up for a date, a shared joke that only the two of you understand; these moments begin with eharmony.… continue reading »


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