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11-Apr-2020 05:47

"I'm not just sitting, waiting to lock eyes with a guy at the Co-op, as we reach for the same pear," she says.

Ann's proactive stance has paid off; she has met a few boyfriends online, including her current one.

(Perhaps this lingering stigma is why most of my interviewees opted to hide behind a pseudonym.) "It no longer feels like a movement of desperation," says Ann, 40, who has dated online on and off for the past 10 years.

Not only has it allowed her to break out of her largely paired-up and insular social circle, it has also given her a sense of control over the uncontrollable.

Sites range from the big "markets" (Match, e Harmony and Ok Cupid) to niche communities such as Green Singles for the Earth lovers, Christian Singles for the Jesus lovers, and Vampire Passions for, well, you get the point.

Mobile apps, such as Tinder and Grindr, connect potential matches based on tidbits like mutual Facebook friends and geographic proximity.

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The comedy of this online encounter competed with my despair.We tend to pair up with people inside the bounds of our everyday: through work, school, friends, etc.But online dating breaks the geographic constraints, allowing relationship-seekers to meet people outside of their natural environments.Toma studies the psychological effects of social networking, including online dating.

Research shows that, not surprisingly, geographic proximity is a top indicator of whom we'll marry.

Instead, I LOLed, then felt pity, for both my suitor and myself.



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